Friday, November 20, 2009
and every problem in the world
sigh. the title is kind of self-explanatory.
face it, not every problem in the world has a solution. and even those which do, might not have a workable one. it's a simple truth, isn't it? i don't understand why people always think that there's an answer to every problem. it's just a truth.
sigh. okay:
1) PLEASE KNOW, THAT YOU HAVE PRIORITIES, AND I HAVE THEM TOO. i don't need to give in to you each time.
2) OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GETTING PISSED BY YOUR WHINING AND STOP BLAMING US COS IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT.
3) I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU THINK I THINK THAT WAY. okay forget it you probably have no idea what i'm talking about.
4) YOU ASSUMPTIONS ARE A LITTLE OFF.
Posted at 9:23 AM
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
being who you are and not a pretense
YESTERDAY. COOKIE BAKING AT RUITONG'S HOUSE IT WAS FUN.
I don't think the Part Ds want to know how we made the cookies, or about the method we used either. And the fact that Shing had the flu yesterday. (HOHO I HOPE NOTHING GOES WRONG AFTER YOU ATE THE COOKIES.) Okay I shall not blog about that.
HI. I SHALL TRY TO BE HAPPY AND GAY TODAY.
Hahah i left the house today at 9.45 AM and met Zer and Xiao Yun and Michelle to go to Tampines. So we took bus 29, and it was apparently the same bus as the Part Cs and Phyllis and Mira and Chew and Shing and Jal! Okay so we were being public nuisances as usual. And then when we got off the bus, the Part Cs evidently turned left. When it was supposed to be right. Michelle and I just turned right and walked and walked to the chalet. And then when we got there, apparently some of us were already there! So all the parts just kind of dao-ed each other until lunch. Okay I shall not elaborate lunch, because lunch is just lunch.
Then it was super funny they tried to dump loads of powder on us, which;
1) Actually help mosquito bites;
2) Evidently attract mosquitoes;
Which is just. Wonderful. So we had this sort of mosquito slapping competition after the powder dumping thing, and we were supposed to sit in a circle to play truth or dare. But we ended up slapping mosquitoes (Hui Chen, Munirah, Michelle, Xiao Yun, me!) instead, and fortunately when Part Cs picked me to answer truth or truth, "Which senior from the other parts would you choose to live with for the rest of your life and why?" Jing Wen spoke softly (fortunately) and no one but me heard so I got away without answering that question, hahah! OHYES VERY FUNNY OMG HALFWAY THROUGH THE GAME RUITONG CALLED AND WANTED TO TALK TO HUIYI OMG AHAHA SO FUNNY.
Then after that we split into 3 groups with Part Bs, our group had Chew and Jal and Michelle and Vanessa and of course, me! Then we played card games with Celeste and Trina and Kathryn, which was totally, hilarious. Then Kathryn left. Then the Part Bs left. Then Celeste and Trina made their lame PUNNY jokes. WHICH CHEW SO TOTALLY DIDN'T GET. We came to kind of conclusion about Michelle and Celeste, which is totally affinity. (Don't ask.) Then we totally stoned until Celeste and Trina passed us the jokers from the deck of cards, and Vanessa made it so funny.
THEN, Amanda and Rebecca and basically the second group joined us, and then Celeste attempted to persuade us to play the 成语game, which totally did not work. Then Michelle brought up THE yearbook. Part Ds expression when they saw it were totally. Priceless. After that Hui Chen came in and Celeste and Trina and Rebecca and Hui Chen played cards while we sort of chatted with Amanda. Then, we started talking about Dean Gee's crush (HAHAH) and Amanda was like, "Don't worry, whatever you say here will not leave this room."
The third group then came to join us, and Michelle and I started talking "animatedly" (quote quote) about them cancelling most Merit CCAs and then the Part Ds overheard Michelle say "MATH SOC IS MY CORE!" Amanda's reply was totally epic. HUH? THEN NCC IS YOUR MERIT?! Okay hahah. OMG DAMN EPIC. SOMEONE ASKED AMANDA IF ANY OF THE PART DS HAD BOYFRIENDS. Then Celeste and Rebecca heard and it was like: "Yeah, AMANDA, I wonder who has a boyfriend too..." Then Amanda was like, DON'T LISTEN TO THEM! Then Xiao Yun and I discussed the yellow paper incident *ahem* (PHYLLIS YOU DON'T REMEMBER?!) which Amanda attempted to force us to reveal but we didn't(:
Then it was kind of late already, and we had to go, only it was RAINING. So we had to stay there for a while and we passed them the lightsticks and the notes. (OHYES PLATOONMATES REBECCA SAYS THANKS FOR THE NOTES.) And then Michelle's dad came, so I took her dad's car to Tampines MRT.
Then our epic story ends here! Thank you for taking time to read this post!
you know, i think the only reason why i can still be kind of happy and kind of gay now is cos it takes quite a while before reality actually kicks in.
i feel stupid.
i feel excessively amused at myself, which is really not a good thing.
Posted at 10:39 AM
Saturday, November 14, 2009
memories
AH YES. i just remembered something from this jazz thing yesterday right. i was like singing along to most of the songs. and then the rest of the sec 1s were staring at me weirdly, and sec 3s were singing too. you know the song "favourite things", the sec 3s totally knew the song. and the sec 1s didn't .__. but i did yay.
talking about songs i realized that most of the songs on my cds are totally 1950 - 1990 songs. and i sing along to almost any carpenters' songs. (eg cos i inserted the cd on my com, my msn status was like Don't Give Up on Us - David Soul and people asked me what the song was o__O)
i guess that just tells you about the type of songs i listen to. and i don't even know what the TUNE of whatever "good girls gone bad is", just only the TITLE seems kind of familiar, maybe cos people keep talking about it.
SMILE A LITTLE SMILE FOR ME.
PLEASE?
(on a random note, i totally love our ncc cca photos, we should really take more during the chalet)
Edit:
I am totally sad listening to certain songs. Don't ask.
and okay i shall post what CM said here, only without the *ahem* name she mentioned *ahem*.
"______ (6 letter name) IS GOING TO LOVE ME FOR THIS."
okay man i can so imagine who the orange iPod was meant for.
and i guess you know who ______ is right. (okay if you don't you can come ask me on msn.)
Posted at 4:59 PM
Friday, November 13, 2009
and it's just incomplete without you
Today was the last day of school, and the entire year of my sec one life, but it felt incomplete. Like there's a missing portion, but I think you know what I'm talking about. The whole, entire, freaking year was really short. We missed a lot of things this year due to H1N1, mostly. Which is just. Sad. And totally depressing.
Arts fest was a blast. Today was our turn to sell stuff in the canteen, and, it was cool. We made a sale to Claire Mok at our booth (Kai Yan refuses to let me post the details D:) AND OMG SHE SAID SOMETHING HILARIOUS. Let me put it this way, it was just extremely amusing, the way she said it and the name she mentioned. Then someone else went to buy another for Claire Mok hahah. We ran around grabbing people and getting them to buy. And now Xiao Yun is sure that I'm a good salesperson, just because I managed to convince Ariel to buy another 2 more shuriken bookmarks (bringing hers to a grand total of 6). Apparently the iPod keychains sold really well, especially the orange ones (hahah i was smart enough to buy mine first). Vanessa got Celeste to buy something, I'm not sure what. And then at one point of time we waited at the foot of the spiral staircase ambushing people to drag back.
Looking back, I think this year has really been emotional for many people *ahem* and also quite upsetting. I totally understand, but understanding really doesn't help or do anything. Kind of like Phyllis telling me that action helps, not reflection. I guess "emotional attachment" would be a pretty good guess as to why people are upset. I mean, seriously, this year has been the most different year in my life. Different, in reference to past years where I would be happy on the last day of school. I guess this year's comes out of being too sad about missed chances, and ignored days.
Everyone's upset about the last day of school.
I'm upset about the last day of school.
Edit:
I totally agree with this quote from Xiao Yun's blog. I deleted the bracketed stuff.
This year has been a weird/fun/exciting/hilarious/stressful year for me. It's like I learnt loads of new stuff and like had loads of fun in between them all. Like all the jokes we shared, laughing at our stupidity, senior's lame jokes and weird antics, sharing secrets, having heartfelt convos and even just competing to see who heard the ncc song more.
Oh man Xiao Yun you just hit the nail on the head. :/
Posted at 5:43 PM
Thursday, November 12, 2009
it's not that i'm upset, i'm just... not too happy.
about what? about life.
i don't know, it's just sort of like... i can't see things completely. as in i only see one portion of it, then i lose view of the whole thing.
忍一时，风平浪静。
退一步，海阔天空。
it's the second phrase which really affected me.
as in to see in it's entirety, you have to step back. and look at it in a whole new, completely different perspective. and think to yourself that it's great. i guess life is really just a bundle of emotions, and it's up to you which ones you pick, really.
so i finally decided not to forget. I WILL/MUST REMEMBER. i won't ever forget, i think, especially, ahem, when it's my _____(5 letter) _________(9 letter).
ARGH TODAY WAS TOTALLY I-WILL-KILL-YOU-ISH.
first. I WILL KILL KAIYAN. for reasons i know you know too. shall not elaborate.
second. XIAOYUN >< gah i dislike you. today was totally... unnecessary. yes, she saw us, we saw her, and etc, BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. really. and astonishingly creepy, if i may say so.
Darn.
I don't understand why.
I always feel extra, spare, excessive, unneeded, expendable.
everything is crashing down on me.
life is crashing down on me.
I need only one word to describe it all, DAMN.
天无绝人之路
一回生二回熟
i have to agree with these. it's true, because, well, it just is.
it kind of reflects what i'm feeling now, you know?
okay so maybe you don't but never mind.
Posted at 5:56 PM
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
too similar and pressing
ack. i realized that npcc has like, 98 cadets?! the last time i saw, that is.
we only have 71 (as of the before ORD)
and ncc land has/had only 51.
also npcc sea and ncc air/land are too close. too close for comfort.
we all have purple light cheer, only it's slightly different for npcc. and theirs is shorter by one verse. the ORD one.
and anyway we're writing notes to the sec 4s, the problem is that:
1) xiaoyun has tiffy's and jaslyn's and cheryl's cards, and we can't find her so we can't get them,
2) renuka and priya and vanathi aren't here?!
3) POOR _____ HER CARDS ARE PASTEL-ISH. and with only some bright colours cos we did hers last SIGHZ ):
and a crap load more but nevermind.
my life is like. idk. weird. strange. contradictory.
I WON'T FORGET, EVER. NOTHING'S EVER GOING TO CHANGE THE FACT THAT HISTORY CAN'T BE FORGOTTEN BY A WILL OF THE MIND.
darn i'm getting bored.
Posted at 2:40 PM
Monday, November 9, 2009
reflections to a goodbye
haha i stumbled upon valerie's blog and realized her last post was about ORD. which makes me want to blog.
i remember what louise told me, and i think it's true, really.
if your platoonmates cry, be strong for them and don't cry. if they don't, feel for them and cry for them.
i just realized, ever since ORD, most of my posts have become about seniors. i really need to get closer to my class. but, i find that i just can't relate to them. as per normal, i stick to platoonmates. i go with them during recess, i find them in the mornings, i stay back with them after school. i chat with them on msn. i don't know why it's been like this. sigh :/ i guess why the only incentives i have to blog are memorable incidents. memorable as in impactful. mostly cca. DAMN IT MY LIFE IS MAJORLY SCREWED. i can so imagine, a few years down the road, how much worse life will be at OUR ORD and OUR graduation. but then life goes on ): but you can't just leave the memories behind and hope to forget. life doesn't work that way, i know it.
graduation was really like ORD, i was hysterical. laughing but not crying. it was really, i don't know, amusing. having the sec 4s sing pass it on and dedication is reminding me of affirmation. it's just. the same impact. (AND OHOH REMEMBER _____'S BLOG IT HAS THE THING ON IT ABOUT US BEING DOWNRIGHT HILARIOUS DURING AFFIRAMATION)
until then. sigh. we'll just have to mend our platoon problems right? we can't have them handling everything, when they don't need to. we need to handle our problems ourselves. we have to be independent. who's going to look after us in sec 4?
shermine says:
yeah
but
DAMN):
i'm also upset for another reason):
Rui Tong says:
life sucks man
shermine says:
yeah
it;s majorly sucking for me):
DAMN DAMN DAMN
Rui Tong says:
haha mine doesnt suck much
shermine says:
sheesh
SIGH
Rui Tong says:
hahaha there are ups and downs man
shermine says:
yeah
but i'm in a going down escalator now
OH WAIT
make that rollercoaster
Rui Tong says:
HAHAHA
nice analogy.
excuse the typos. i hate them too ):<
please, stop thinking you're the only ones who care cos even if we don't show it, we can still feel. all we do, we do for you. you're so self-centered and thinking you're right all the time, while i'm quite sure we all know you aren't. stop taking charge for once and let others do something, they may just be waiting for a chance that YOU didn't give them and YOU snatched and took away.
DAMN IT LIFE MAJORLY SUCKS. :/
Posted at 6:48 PM
Sunday, November 8, 2009
a healed broken heart will leave scars
SIGH.
i don't know what's wrong with me.
i'm feeling depressed and emo and moody and the likes.
you don't know what's going on, do you.
get off my back and stop freaking shit pretending you know me.
leave me alone to find my own peace.
inner balance.
let me have some time to think through it.
in other words, i just don't need you around here.
you won't understand me.
stop saying i'm emo cos i have a reason.
and a darn good one too, if i may add.
Posted at 8:46 PM
Friday, November 6, 2009
when memories are all that's left
only one word to summarise it all.
GOODBYE.
today was graduation.
and then also sec 4 farewell.
i'll miss them.
and then the nostalgia. dedication and pass it on.
argh. it really makes me feel bad i don't wanna blog.
Posted at 4:53 PM
Thursday, November 5, 2009
last day ever
romeo and juliet.
whatever it is, infocomm farewell was HILARIOUS. we had 10 pizzas. and they cost about $119?
then after that we went to infocomm labs where we played jeopardy and rebuses. and you know what? for jeopardy.
trina: this question is open to the floor!
then there were 4 groups. and then the 3 other groups chose option a, b, and c. then we figured, heck, it doesn't have a penalty anyway. so we tried d. AND OMG GUESS WHAT! the answer was d. then kimberlychoo and i were slapping hi fives and then we got our 500 points yay. rebuses kind of sucked. i knew a lot of the answers but then even if i raised my hand first (i was sure i did at least once) trina didn't see .___. and then so.
then pictionary was just. gay. hoho then i was supposed to do a song called "don't trust me" but, i didn't even know the song existed! or the band which sang it. so i drew something that looked like good girls gone bad haha. even more crazy was, i begged trina to give us books okay. AND THEN YOU KNOW WHAT.
she gave us like pride and prejudice and kimberlychoo was like drawing a lion then x1000 and we were going HUH? then trina gave us this SO obvious hint. "it's a classic by jane austen". THEN IT WAS LIKE DUH. OMG. ONLY 1 BOOK WHAT RIGHT. then next was like the weird weird javascript one. and we had a hard time guessing just cos yilei didn't know the java icon. and after that was the secret garden, followed by the da vinci code. i had totally no idea what kimberly was drawing haha.
.___. and anyway today was quite interesting in all, i'll post the LEANING TOWER OF PIZZA and ROMEO AND JULIET on fb.
Posted at 8:03 PM
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
life in a song
first.
WE GOT SECOND FOR KARAOKE COMPETITION YAY :D
hoho. total of like, what, 3 hours of preperation only. not bad huh. http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=171597670998&ref=nf
YAY.
second.
for some undefined reasons (or reasons that can't be said)
I'M HAPPY YAY HAHA HIGH HYPER ETC.
you really don't wanna know why(:
anyway. cos i'm happy(:
this is a short post. so?
Posted at 8:17 PM
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
don't know much
delving deeper (look, i don't really care if this is a weird caption)
ARGH.
i'm feeling... confused.
PHYLLIS YOUR LJ IS NEGATIVELY AFFECTING ME.
okay never mind i shall rant.
i don't know why i'm so angry. it's like all the pent up feelings from very very long ago have been released. and i don't feel any better. LIFE IS SO FRUSTRATING. i mean, seriously!
it's like they say oh, (something something something -- ANYTHING) and then i realize that i don't know what people are talking about. kind of makes me feel like my life's going in crazy directions. like i'm different. it's like what phyllis is saying. i agree. people tend to gravitate towards others whom they can talk to. like, you know, i can talk to michelle and phyllis and xiaoyun. i mean we have a lot in common.
what the shit i mean. i don't know what i want, really. ALL I NEED IS SOMEONE TO REALLY CARE ABOUT ME. just being a companion. just. BEING.
don't try to console me or try to tell me that life doesn't suck, et cetera. just leave me alone to have some space of myself, will you. i'm human too, i'm alive. if you can complain of this, of that, just think about how much lesser i, and some others, might have than you.
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE SHIT IS GOING ON, DON'T TRY TO TELL ME YOU DO.
Posted at 7:47 PM
