Thursday, June 30, 2011
Isolation, I don't want to Sit on a lemon tree
Right now I am just like, eh, just let this be over as soon as possible do you bloody know how much it hurts to hold on so long? Just make it quick and clean and maybe it'll be better that way. I'd choose to hold on tighter but it won't help anyway, so why pain everyone and why the fuss? Maybe it's really better this way.
...or it could just be me, really. I think recently I've been having really morbid thoughts, and when I say morbid, I mean really, really, downright disturbing, depressing and gory thoughts. Which if course, is terrible. Sometimes I just to be around people so I can stop myself from thinking about things like this, what the hell is wrong with me?
Must. Think. Happy. Thoughts.
Some people are nice to talk to when you feel upset and just want to think about random things.
/figuratively hugs some infocomm people. Guys, I know you don't know I felt kind of out of it, but thanks anyway.
Also, our podcast project is really entertaining. Sze Ning and I are the people with the mad ideas in the group, and Yi Lei is the one who sometimes crosses out our ideas. Qiqi is the one who proofreads everything and smiles at our ridiculous antics. Infocomm, right now I give you my all.
I wish my parents were more understanding that way.
You know, it scares me that we're specialists and it's only now that I realize with a freaking scary jolt that more than half our time has passed. And now right in front of us is what we've been getting ready for all these years and finally, finally, our time really has come. And somehow I just can't find it in my heart to be prepared. All this time what we've been doing has really come to naught, it seems. No matter how prepared I am, how prepared we are, I just can't seem to face this. It's too soon. It's always too soon, and in a way, always too late. It'll never be just right. There'll never be a right time. Granted, I want to say I just want it to be over so we just just get it over and done with, but somehow, the responsibility of it all is just so. Breathtaking. So large. So, in a warped way, almost... majestic. Gosh, we are so screwed over. Perhaps, though, I won't understand how the others feel about this entire thing. Perhaps I'm the only one. Perhaps I'm not. Perhaps I'll never know. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, and finally, perhaps again.
Screw this, it's that time of the year again. I realized every year around this time to mid October or so I'll be super depressed somehow and for some random reasons. No, this time it isn't ORD getting me down, it's just, ugh, everything else.
When you start feeling this way you realize the usefulness and value of existential angst.
[/edit: Jeez, I stare at my Writer's Block LJ and wonder if I'm undergoing some sort of existential crisis.]
Posted at 8:19 PM
Monday, June 27, 2011
即使未曾如何嚐百味 然而這樣也是完美 真心奉獻全意地
Well, this is when they say "better me than them" comes in.
And yes ex-staff this is when I'm actually talking about posts! And trust me, the others would feel worse without the posts than I do right now, because well, right now I have a lot more things on my mind. And also I will get/am getting over it because I don't even think I deserved it in the first place, they were better than me. Don't feel bad for me! Really! (Only because xiaoyun told me you saw that and thought it was about that [and I realized I don't have you on MSN!], so I read through and realized it does sound like it's about that, but it isn't. Really. It's just the stress getting to me, I think.)
No, the previous post was not about posts. It was about, well, things in general.
...I feel like platoonmates are avoiding me/are more distant than ever. And no, it's not just me kaiyan. Well, what else can I say about this?
Right now I feel like slapping a lot of people and crying because SCREW THEM ALL I DO NOT HAVE 48 HOURS IN A DAY.
So I suppose I should thank the people who've been listening to me rambling and cracking up and breaking down and everything these few days. Talking to y'all made me feel a lot better, really. So yeah, thanks! I think you've been really great people and yeah thanks for listening and understanding my grouching and stuff. And yes, various people on various matters, and don't take this the wrong way, not posts.
Because I swear I somehow manage to make everything sound like it's about posts._.
But really, it's not.
REALLY.
I can almost imagine some people giving me the *rightttt* look now.
Believe it or not.
OH WOW I JUST LAUGHED AT SOMETHING REALLY RETARDED.
Okay so maybe it's not exactly retarded but hey it's amusing. And rather hilarious. REALLY WHO USES _____ _________?! Not that I have anything against it, but it really is rather. Awkward to use. Well, so maybe some people are just weird.
Spam downloaded TVB themesongs. The older ones are awesome.
Also, can't help but like
this come on it is Leo Ku! And features Nancy Wu! And Love and Honesty is a pretty awesome title!
Labels: CCA
Posted at 10:24 PM
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Maybe one day we will Shine brighter than the stars
You know what I'm trying to tell myself now?
What will be, will be.
I really do hope so.
So much for all that.
I knew I was right.
And I knew you were right, too.
We all were.
And I always, always, will remember how the choice was never mine.
Nor anyone else's.
Perhaps one day we'll finally discover how much it all meant.
But until then I don't see the point.
And maybe one day, we'll trust in these decisions again.
Until then, never ever.
Never more.
Never less.
Maybe it's true, maybe you're right.
But I knew I was right.
I was proven right.
So were you.
Who's to say who was right?
And who's to decide who's wrong?
Maybe we'll never get an answer.
Maybe we will.
I suppose we can all still continue hoping.
But I suppose hoping.
Just hoping for that one day.
It is rather ridiculous.
Is it not?
Maybe we'll never know.
But again, I reiterate.
The choice is not ours.
It was never ours to begin with.
That is how disjointed my thoughts are right now.
Is referring to line breaks.
Oh, and you have no idea what I'm referring to.
It probably isn't what you think it is.
Seriously, what will be, will be.
I'm just taking it as it comes.
If it comes my way, then I'm lucky.
If not, I'm just going to continue as it is.
Forget it.
Also, Louise, if you see this, I'll tell you I really was right.
Remember what I told you during RS?
It really did come true.
I knew it couldn't be anything else.
Again, I really was right.
[Edit:}
There is the possibility that once, long ago, they have.
Posted at 1:35 PM
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Right now I am just like WAIT YOU MEAN CECILIA CHEUNG AND NICHOLAS TSE ARE MARRIED.
Posted at 9:31 PM
Monday, June 20, 2011
And we'll linger on Time can't erase a feeling this strong
Okay super overdue post.
oh my gosh, the fact the fact that we're now sergeants just doesn't hit me.
Right now I don't give a damn that we didn't sweep the awards (because Ma'am Angela/HQ is just screwed that way) but damn it, we still did get more than any other school PLUS highest 2SG percentage (seriously, how can you blame Michelle?) because
PERHAPS WE OWNED THE COURSE?
Also, guys, I totally didn't expect to get nominated? I was expecting ruitong actually I still don't know why Sir Idham picked me over her (except for timer on the first day, perhaps?). People, I am proud of us.
Also don't feel so sad kaiyan and xiaoyun you know you're better than them (blatantly obvious!), treat it as being magnanimous and giving others a chance. And anyway be happy, we still owned the course either way and we couldn't have done it without you guys, okay? Never forget that you're still part of the platoon and deep in our hearts we know that we
do own the course, just that Ma'am Angela and HQ in general is just screwed and hate us.
Also, amusing stuffumz.
1) Sir Iqbal's beret dropping off. It was amusing because we bet it would.
2) We group hugged Ma'ams. It was cool. Sir Hafiz is wrong, we are not
his RGS cadets.
3) We went for dinner. I wore combat boots with jeans.
Right, so incident 1), was due to the fact that we were betting that his beret was going to drop off during AAR. I bet Sirs Iqbal and Daryl totally thought ruitong and I were like gay or something. Then for 3) we literally broke staying out late for dinner records I SWEAR. And zer kept on sitting in diam!
Guys, we totally owned the course, and I don't give a damn about HQ because we got the most awards and the most 2SG percentage HELLZYEAH.
Posted at 9:44 AM
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
I need to be, Right by your side
My
god (and I don't even have one) screw this all damn it you think I want?!
Look, I'm sorry I can't find a way out of this but damn it spare a thought for me, for
some of us. I'd do that too, but it would be very much appreciated if you could ask the bus service to come at 5.30, when it leaves the terminal at that time. It's not my fault I live so far, and you seriously cannot expect my parents to bring me there damn it they need to sleep too, even if I don't and
you don't.
Also, screw you so much. I feel like crying. Not because I'm stressed.
Yes, I know that it isn't your fault, but now you're making it seem like my fault and whatthe
hell it really isn't my fault that the bus timings are so ridiculous, is it?
I officially give up. Right now I am trying to beat my cousin at Hell Tetris, which is ridiculously difficult and I don't get how people can even win. Maybe I should just stick to two player Tetris and completely trashing Louise at.
Well, it's nice to know that I'm better than her at something.
On a side note, I just read
something and remembered something a certain someone told me about that something and gee, I just laughed my ass off.
And so to keep from punching anything/anyone I will resist and control my temper, because damn it, I must prove my point.
And also FANTASTIC STUFF XIAOYUN'S DAD WILL SEND US TO HQ ON BOTH DAYS, JOYYYYYY. Then for last day my father can send me, so what can I say,
awesome.
Posted at 1:19 PM
Sunday, June 12, 2011
若有天因有这段感慨 才珍惜你的所爱
Right, so my family just spent three days straight watching Gun Metal Grey, which in my opinion, has a theme song comparable to Eternal Happiness' and the Herbalist's Manual, but EH will still own them all anytime because it was sung by Kelly Chen, come on. Still, I love the theme song.
And anyway at the ending I felt so. Cheated! I mean, whattttt. I mean okay, Carson dies. (Okay the annoying part about this is that the scriptwriters didn't give Vincent and Nancy much materials to work with in the first place, so I applaud them for doing pretty awesomely with what they've got.) But I think the ending is so, uh. Also, I don't really like Vincent Wong (he is completely overshadowed by Nancy/Michael/Felix/whoever-he's-doing-the-scene-with so maybe that's why, and they're so much better than him) but I'm biased, so there. On the other hand, I really, really, disliked Felix's acting in here because it was too overdone. But okay yes the ending. It was so false I swear especially when Jessica didn't die because I felt so cheated. So cheated that I actually became hungry at eleven. And basically everyone/most of them end up with some sort of tragic incident except for Nancy, but then again her fiance dies and her sister was badly injured, so, tragedy there.
And Carson had to die just when most people were warming up to him and 阿诗 and I mean that was so what-the-hell, I swear everyone felt cheated. But I liked Nancy's role in here, because I can hardly remember her in a role that wasn't that of a villain (example, Legend of the Demigods) or some home-wrecker. Or con-artist, spoilt brat (No Regrets, Triumph in the Skies), etc. Or some pathetic b**** which is practically everything else that she's acted in, which I swear doesn't do her justice. Though if you ask me to pick between between Nancy in GMG and Fala in NR for best supporting I'd pick Nancy, because I thought Fala's role in NR was kind of weak. Oh, and she doesn't have the ridiculously annoying hairstyles of NR.
Right. I liked the first arc and hated the second and third ones.
And you see why I haven't been on the computer for the past four days or so.
Also.
Must. Break. Habit. Of. Referring. To. People. By. *ahem*. (Like Ada Choi's/Cecilia Cheung's/Nancy Wu's/Niki Chow's very amusing nicknames, seriously.)
Which just proves that the females tend to have more hilarious nicknames than the males. Especially Ada Choi I mean seriously. I laugh just at the thought of it.
Epic how Nancy's best TVB friend is Leila, of all people. Amusing.
Okay, so there. MUG SPECS AND, UH, DO PROJECTS.
Posted at 4:29 PM
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
The night has gone, a part of yesterday
Oh, another thing to pick on January Jones' portrayal of Emma.
Seriously, did you see the clothes she's wearing? Emma wouldn't be caught dead wearing though. Honest. She has a much better sense of style than most, I must say. Well, I do notice that the clothes in the movies are either:
1) No sense of style, seriously, is underwear the best they can do to bring out Emma as top class bitch;
2) She's way too overdressed for Emma's, um, original days in X-Men;
3) She's way too underdressed for Emma's later days;
and finally 4) They should just stick with her Gen X image, I think that would have been a lot better pulled off. Face it, if the producers just can't follow through Emma's bitch image, they should just stick to an image they can follow.
Also, WHERE'S THE COMPLETE WHITE LEATHER OUTFIT THAT EMMA'S SO FAMOUS FOR HUH.
Another thing, this is obvious not comic-canon. Okay, so I just noticed this because I spent time reading up about the plot of the movie but I realized that this is way, way, way before Morrison's New X-Men, and so there is no Genosha, no genocide, and ergo, no diamond form. In fact, Emma wasn't even part of the X-Men, so there. I think people tend to forget that. In fact, I think most people don't know that.
AUGH LEMON TREE IS STUCK IN MY HEAD. (Damn though, I must say I like Fool's Garden.)
Posted at 12:51 PM
Thursday, June 2, 2011
And glide like a seven-forty-seven
Okay so I feel so bad about a certain *something* but ugh I have no idea how to put it. Does that make sense? Yes? No?
Right, so I'm back doing -ahem, some things- and some others. Okay, vague, but. And I wanted to go for RSAF OH but I couldn't cos I was busy and ughhh. At least gold wing was good.
Talking about gold wing! I liked it, um, very much? I mean, it was awesome, in a very screwed, masochistic way. And I'm also looking forward to specs cos I want to get it over and done with. (And yknow what gold wing was infinitely easier than silver wing, damn it.)
ALSO MIRA WHAT TIME DO WE CRASH YOUR HOUSE (is hoping that you will see this).
One of the first things I was annoyed about X-Men: First Class the moment I saw it was January Jones as Emma Frost. As in, I would still want to watch it (I do), but I think she isn't exactly the best choice. Not that I can think of another on the spot, but she just doesn't exude the same sensuality that Emma does in the comics, and her voice is just completely off. I mean, when you read about Emma, you can imagine her speaking in the cool, icy, somehow almost thick voice. Also I think she just isn't Emma enough, and she doesn't get the idea of what makes Emma, Emma. Emma isn't a nice person. She's queen bitch, and remains that way even as an X-Man. What she wants, she works to get. January Jones may know that, but she doesn't show it.
Oh, and *ahem*influencemuch*ahem*.
Posted at 2:25 PM
